CVO Art & Dance Therapy

Well before I get to the therapy part let me just say the time in the Career Closet was awesome (it's upstairs from Albin's Plumbing on 9th). It hadn't occurred to me what fun it is making outfits for people. The Soroptomists and Altrusans have nice stuff to offer, and it's a really nice space, too. Before anyone showed, Molly and I had a chance to fill each other in on our lives, and I learned the reason she has so much joy and lives big is because she is a cancer survivor.

Her daughter and son-in-law took 18 months to travel around the world and have a blog to show for it. I ckecked it out and guess what - they used flickr to post photos.

We had one client come in. Her hands were shaking and she fumbled with her words, but then our eyes met and she locked in and held. I recognized what was in those eyes, and she felt more at ease. We went straight to the item at hand. She was a size four and was going to New York compliments of Pfizer to give a speech on wellness. Apparently she's a poster child for their schizophrenia drug and lives two lives. One on disability in Oregon and the other First Class with limos in New York. (I just realized the irony in that. ...ahem!) It was fun to watch her transformation as we put together a suit for her. Black skirt, white blouse, black shoes.......but something was missing. Molly had been walking around with a black pin stripe jacket, but had put it back because the matching skirt was missing. Let's try it anyway, I said, and.... it worked. This shaky little woman suddenly stood tall and proud. She had found her power.

As if that weren't highpoint enough, the art was calling. I went down with only less than an hour of time while the artist booths were open, but that didn't stop me from visiting the wine tasting booth to learn about a winery in Philomath. They're having their big open house the weekend before Thanksgiving, which means double your pleasure for me, two weekends in a row to visit wineries! I promised her I'd see her then. Even tho the Pinot Noir wasn't great, the promise of a beautiful vineyard will get me there.
Onto the booths with a nice buzz, and there was a different draw for me. I walked right past the pottery but couldn't stay away from the photography, and photographers........This woman Denise W. Ross uses the old cameras with the slot thing and black draping - you know, the real old kind. Black and white film then she digitally colorizes each one herself and adds a musical component to her views......completely original and astounding. She calls this one hope. Pretty cool, I said send hope and there it was. I couldn't get over it. She said it's an amazing time to get into photography, the field is wide open and there are no rules. I commented on what a generous outlook that was, and she said, while it would be competition, it is more of a selfish thing because she wants the world to be full of happy, peaceful artists. Hmn.....can't argue with that.
Next it was the Balafon Marimba Ensemble's last performance and there was dancing in the streets. People of all ages - dancing in unison - it was a primal, yet most gentle, of crowds. I loved every minute of it! Veronica's clowns turned out to be her date, Bill. ha ha Most of all, I enjoyed this one kid - about 12 or 13 maybe - who came out onto a balcony. He had that awkward hesitation, then just started busting out some moves, like Steve Martin's doing the Egyptian. My friends and I tried to encourage him, echoing his every move, laughing uproariously. He turned around, stuck his butt out, and gave a nice little shake!shake!shake! then ran back inside with embarrassed glee.
Square 2 of 6 today to celebrate being done with cleaning the house, laundry and paying the bills -- in other words, being on the downward slope toward getting away!

Fractalised

I got hit with a landmine at today's Altrusa meeting. I was feeling all proud of myself because it was the first time I didn't tear up while saying the Pledge of Allegiance. I know, it's just one of those things that happens to me, like the time I sat with tears streaming down my face as a table of little five year olds in Maygen's kindergarten class sang America the Beautiful for me. So anyway, I thought I was doing great, even after hearing the speaker, who was a 24 year old recovering drug addict single mom speak about her recovery and how helpful the PEP program has been. PEP is one of Altrusa's big programs, Parent Enhancement Program, for young moms from teens through age 25. It was a little emotional thinking how easily that could've been me, was me in some ways.....but I was still fine, glad for her strength, glad to have something to contribute....
The very end of the meeting is where they do Brag Basket. You put $1 in the basket and brag about something. Bev said, you should say you're going to Florida to see her off! I said wait til I get back. She's like no, say it NOW! Bev's a Realtor who doesn't take no for an answer, so I pulled a dollar out of my purse, stood up and dropped it in the basket, and said, "I'm going to see my daughter..........", and choked up. I looked down at the woman sitting next to me. She whispered encouragingly, "just SAY it!" I looked at Bev, who said, "I'll say it for you." I gladly agreed and waved her on as I sat back down. Bev turns to the room and starts to say the words, and turns back to me - now SHE'S crying, and I start laughing as I'm crying, too. Bev got the words out, all patriotic, that I'm going to visit my daughter to send her off before she goes to Iraq to serve our country in war and we all need to be praying for her (which to me is a most valuable thing for one person to do for another. Maygen's response when I told her about this - "I am set, then! I will have no (or little) fear"). All I remember is Bev's eyes as we looked at each other across the table, laughing and crying, well, mostly crying. She came over and we gave each other a big hug, we were both taken off guard with ourselves....... but the cool thing is, I felt completely safe having this emotional display happen in front of a roomful of people, not people - strong women. I have wanted women like this in my life for an eternity, it seems.
Someone came up to me asking for a hug saying she knew exactly how I felt because her son-in-law left that day for a year in Iraq. I managed to escape still relatively intact until I got into the car. Then it was like the dam opened and these weren't just tears threatening, these were royal hiccupping sobs attempting to burst out. It's like the thing isn't really real until you actually say it, or hear someone else say it. The day i found out was the day I ran into you, and I guess you've been the best diversion but now it's time to face the music. I thought, I can't go back to work like this! I turned right out of the country club and went looking for your road. I found it, there sat your car....that helped matters some, enough. Okay, so little rivers down my cheeks all the way back to work. An hour later I got a really sweet email from the President of the club saying she knew it was difficult for me to let everyone know but she's glad I did and to please let her know what she and Altrusa can do for either me or my daughter.
The meaning of fractals for this posting is this. That single mom is rebuilding her shattered life and I too once had nothing but sharp jagged pieces of a bleeding life to build from. Not anymore. Instead of shattered, I have fractals. Truly beautiful and amazing.

Tradition Continued

I was about 8 or 9 years old when my big brother Spencer went off to college. I baked brownies and sent them - untested and untasted - from my house in Basking Ridge, NJ to him at Ohio Northern University in Ada, Ohio. I never heard how they were but that was back in the late 60's and he was a bonafide hippie. I am sure it was fine.
The tradition has continued with everyone else who went off to college: my siblings, nephews and of course my own children. The latest is my nephew Robbie, who has just begun his freshman year on a soccer scholarship at Univ. of Scranton in PA. I baked him granola bars. There were Adriatic figs at the store, so I included some of those, along with dried strawberries and cranberries, golden raisins, pumpkin seeds, pine nuts and walnuts. The secret ingredient that makes these granola bars ridiculously good is.....virgin coconut oil.
S